Friday, December 31, 2010

How to Kill the Mood 101

Text from the boy: 
"Please be careful tomorrow, and keep an eye out for dbags. I kinda (much more than kinda) like you and would give pretty much anything to kiss you at midnight tomorrow night..."

Without thinking...my reply: 
"Oh, you wouldn't want to do that. The last boy I kissed at midnight was in federal prison three weeks later." 

Bahahahaha. Ooops. Anyway, happy new year! Xoxo. 

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Oh about the motorcycle...

Totally forgot to elaborate on that, but I'm seriously considering getting a motorcycle for next summer. True story: I absolutely cannot afford nor need a car but I would LOVE the ability to ride away somewhere fun and scenic. Nothing croch-rocketesque, but something more along the lines of a 60s Triumph.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

I'm Considering a Motorcycle

God has a ridiculous sense of humor. Like, for real. This is a long story that might disappear off the blog at any moment -- so take some notes if you're interested in retaining the details. Let us begin at the beginning:

I graduated from college around two o'clock on a very rainy and chilly afternoon last May. After the standard photos and congratulations, I spent most of the day trying to figure out how to pack four-years worth of crap into six suitcases. That evening, after a fine dinner out with my parents and friends, KM and I picked up some energy drinks and headed back to campus to celebrate the proper way. The irony of this whole thing is a bit surreal to me, but I love telling long stories to make short points, so please stick it out. Our campus has this blue sidewalk where each year, seniors sign their messages before leaving. SC and I had missed ours because we were up to no good with KM in Indiana at the Vera Bradley outlet sale, but lucky for us her fabulous boyfriend has snagged us a paint-pen. For weeks, we hadn't found a good time to sign, but seeing as how graduation night was out last chance...we had to do it then. We were liquid at this point and gathering our boys from their frat house, a group of us set off towards the sidewalk.

MH & CK (you'll remember them from this post), SC, her boyfriend, myself and two random alumni ventured up the Hill that night. Half-way there, SC and I decided that the boys were too drunk to not write completely inappropriate things on the sidewalk so we pretended to lose the pen and proceeded to stage a photo-shoot involving various campus statues. Who knew Thomas Jefferson liked Miller High Life? So, anyway, one of these said alumni is cute. Per my usual college shenanigans (haha, who am I kidding, they've hardly ended in college), he and I end up kissing behind central hall. I learn later that MH is not only his younger brother, but that MH had encouraged him to make a move, then persuaded the group to abandon us on the Hill. After Central Hall, we try unsuccessfully to steal bicycles, harass freshman dormitories, and ultimately end up jumping a fence at the college preschool to break-in to the playhouse. (Yeah. True story, I ripped the back pocket of my favorite jeans on that damn fence.) The story continues, but to say the least, the night was an excruciatingly perfect finish to my four years there. Photos and video exist by request only.

I realize that I sound like the captain of team slut here, but to be perfectly honest: one...I'm not, and two...I pretty much figured that this particular boy would saunter out of my life the way the rest have. Not in a hurtful or dramatic fashion, but those of you who know me are also quite aware that I've had a number one for many years.

The Govnah and I have quite the history, little of which needs to get rehashed here. He and I have spoken twice since I moved out east; both times he called me. Neither one of these phone-calls conjured up the butterflies that his caller ID used to, a fact that I took a lot of pride in. Finally, the healing process had started.

With everything that had changed: new job, new environment, amazing life -- how could it not? Suddenly I have the world at my fingertips, and one of the very last things on my mind are a marriage and family. Those things will happen later. However, this does nothing to change the fact that finding out about the Govnah's nuptials left me feeling like someone had dropped an anvil on my chest.

I suppose this is what I get for checking Facebook at work, but seriously, what the fuck? I promise I wasn't stalking -- well, at least it didn't start that way. It began with a photo on my newsfeed and ended with me finding photos of the wedding on his brother's profile page. Does anything in-between really matter? No. In the two conversations we've had in the last few months he explained that he was in the midst of starting a non-profit investigative journalism school for college students with the young woman who made waves a few years back when she dressed up as a hooker to expose voter fraud in acorn offices throughout the country.

Turns out this woman is now Mrs. Govnah.

Its not odd or surprising that he neglected to mention this to me; I think we both know it was unnecessary. Shocked, I stared at my screen for minutes, then I did what any hot-blooded girl would do: I searched through all the pictures to see a close-up of her ring (tragically unavailable), stepped out of my office, called my best friend (cried), called my mom (cried), stepped into the bathroom, cleaned up my act, touched up my make-up and carried on with my day. Oh, and somewhere in there, I penned a blog post.

Having had a few days to consider all of this, I gotta say, I think I dodged a bullet on this one. Moreover, I have some advice: if you ever find yourself in a similar situation, I suggest you hold yourself together long enough to get to the company Christmas party, where you proceed to drink loads of expensive wine and then win an iPad. I dunno, it made me feel better.

Also, that boy, the one who I imagined would just up and blow away like a snowflake? Well, one week after graduation he called himself an idiot for not getting my number, and actually, he actually hasn't gone anywhere since. Anywhere that is, except DC, where he has visited me...twice.

Oh, and here are some songs. Xoxoxo.


Snoop Dog - Wet (Hahaha, yeah, for real)
Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeroes - Home
Toby Keith - Bullets in the Gun
Marina & the Diamonds - Hollywood
The New Pornographers - Crash Years
Wiz Khalifa - Black & Yellow

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Queen of My Doublewide Trailer

By some strange fluke, a group of us has ended up at a local Irish pub on Tuesdays for about the last month to play bar trivia and soak up one another's company. I'm (proud isn't the right word...pleased?) to say that knowledge of the above country song landed us third place the other night. Larissa, ya feel me on this one, I'm sure, but that is not what I'm here to share today.  

Given the fact that an unusually large percentage of their alumni wind up in this very city, I imagine that it one day occurred to my alma mater that erecting a building here would make sense for a variety of reasons. Three years, millions of dollars, and one large-welcome party later, it opened for business on Friday. Built to serve not only our alumni population, but also the students who venture this way to study throughout the year, its a four-story thing with classic design elements. Basement has classrooms, first floor holds a foyer and large lecture room, up the stairs are offices, third floor library, and fourth floor sitting area and rooftop terrace. Needless to say, the place is beautiful. It looks like they plucked it right off campus and nestled it here.

After a long-winded (though very rah-rah-Constitution) speech from our President, they let us loose on the place to explore and partake, and seriously, given as much money as I owe these people, the very least they can do is let me drink on them once in a while. It was fun, and a very nice opportunity to see several people who I didn't even know were here and lots of the staff with whom I spent four-years working. After the event, I ventured with a few people down to a local bar, where I though we could just catch up and grab some dinner, but as it turned out, we stumbled (not literally, at least, not yet) upon the unofficial after-party.

About thirty people from the opening, most of which were members of my very very favorite fraternity in college (read: there were only four girls there,) had come around to keep the party alive. The mix was eclectic and although I didn't know very many of the people, new friends are good! So, doing the social G&G thing, I met people, made laughs, caught up, blah blah blah.

But really, we all know that if I blogged about every time I went to a bar with people, this thing would be (a) boring and (b) full. So what happened? This! This is what happened:

Sitting to my left was a guy and seriously the first thing out of his mouth is a joke about how I was just another Hillsdale-Daddy's girl-Kappa with her David Yurman on. Three things -- I am not a Daddy's girl. I was not a Kappa. And what kind of boy knows what David Yurman is? I responded with something equally sassy, and after that we were friends. He was cute and flirty...another lawyer! OMG. They are ALL LAWYERS HERE! After the big group paid the tab, he asked me if I could join him at the bar for just one more, and being the girl who's a sucker for flattery, I did.

Our chat continued until...

"Ya, I'm really not a big fan of (insert college president's name here."
"Why? I mean, I don't love the man, but you can't deny that he's smart and good at his job."
"Well, there was just this situation once upon a time."
"Haha, what happened."
"Well... on September 11th...(voice fades)"
Ummmmm, where were you when that happened? Because if you're my age, you were definitely in eighth grade, which would make you approximately nine years younger than the boy sitting across from me. This fact is hysterical to me; I can cannot contain my laughter. Still can't, actually.

Monday, November 29, 2010

What Should I Be Doing? Oh, right, running.

Whatever. I don't feel like it, but I know its what I'll end up doing as soon as I'm done here, so hey, its all good. Hi! Right now I'm listening to the Mumford & Sons album, eating pumpkin fluff, and putting my feet up after a mega long day on the job. Like, woah, today was a total Monday. That said, I have a job and for that I am tres thankful.

So, Thanksgiving in the G&G High-rise was a quiet affair. Madeline took off the Friday before, so for a WHOLE WEEK I had the house to myself. It was kind of amazing. Yes, of course I wish that I could have jet away back home, up to Michigan, or even to some sunshine filled island but, truth be told, it just wasn't in the budget this year. So instead I filled my (almost work-free) weekend with adventures like a bike ride around the city, black Friday shopping, and lots of Netflix. I should probably have taken pictures, and promise I'll try and be better about adding photos to the bloggy-blog, but for now, you're stuck with just a few here and there. Also, its still ridiculously warm here. Chilly at night, but daylight hours top out between fifty-five and sixty degrees. One, I'm in for a rude awakening when I go home for Christmas and two, I miss the snow but I'm very happy about not having to walk through it just yet. Everyone keeps telling me their nightmare stories about last year's "Snowmageddon," and while it sounds like a royal pain...back home we just whip out the tractor and go to work.

Speaking of home and tractors, I put a phone call into my brother the other day. He's good. At this point, I suppose it shouldn't shock me that my parents are still going along with whatever charade he's up to, but seriously! How the hell he is getting away with this, I'll never know. Anyway, this was not the highlight of our conversation, no no. That would be when he told me he wanted to have kids by the time he is ... wait for it ... TWENTY FIVE!! This, this from my brother who turns 21 in just over one month. He want children. Sweet Jesus. I was am shocked. The good news is he plans on finding a wife first.

Moving on, I haven't found a church here that I like, and that bothers me. There is one near my house, but the few times I've been there, it (stop the presses...I switched to Christmas music around paragraph no. two, and now Big Bad Voodoo Daddy's "Last Night [I Went Out with Santa Claus]" is playing. One of my faves. Yay.) just seriously hasn't been what I want out of a mass. The choir has an old-school vibe, but adds these new-age chants to Mass and Sunday's homily was legitimately five minutes long. No good. Several times, I've just trekked up to the Basilica, because, seriously, having the opportunity to worship there is unreal. I could do it every Sunday, but that has its own shortcomings. Church is a communal place, and though beautiful, the Basilica doesn't have the community vibe. Prayers in that department would be much appreciated.

After church this week, Madeline and I showed great restraint in not purchasing a live Christmas tree for our apartment. So tempting! Instead, we let ourselves indulge in some Ethiopian food at a local place on our way home. Everywhere you look around here, there are these amazing little kitchy restaurants with every type of fare you can imagine, and being a creature of habit (read: Chipotle) I don't venture off into the land of the unknown nearly as often as I should. Lucky for me, Madeline is a total foodie. Now, the idea of eating at a restaurant that serves food from a country where a large percentage of the population is starving seems slightly off to me, but I love capitalism, so we went inside. (Note: If I ever write a book, that last sentence is totally going in.) As an appetizer, we ordered veggie sambussas, a deep-fried lentil and spice mixture, and for our main course beef & lamb tibs. For all I know, tibs may be the parts of a cow that they only eat in Ethiopia, but never mind that, it was delicious. They served the dish family style, mixing the beef and lamb and surrounding it with a variety of condiments: the red sauce was a spicy, curry-esque sauce, then potatoes, followed by a lentil chili and yellow smash thing, and finally salted tomatoes. To eat this concoction, pictured above, you tear a strip of injera (picture a sponge-cake shaped like a tortilla and then make it the color of a gray Crayola crayon) and use your hot little hands to pick up everything you'd like to stuff in your mouth. It was soooooo good, and the perfect post-church outing for Miss Madeline and I.

Oh, but before I leave you pretties for the gym, (I'm 99% positive she doesn't read this, but if she does, oh, hey Jess! Congratulations on the kid!) I picked up Jessie's baby gift this weekend. Omg. Love. And seriously, I may be the only of of us that can outfit this tiny being in said outfit. Behold, the prepster child:

Obsessed.

Monday, November 15, 2010

So Miss Madeline and I are

perusing Petfinder.com. This will NOT end well. Seriously, how on EARTH am I supposed to say no!Banks: Beagle, Dog; Arlington, VABruce: Newfoundland Dog, Dog; Bethesda, MDAstro 2 years: Border Collie, Dog; Mclean, VA
Ooooo, my heart hurts. I miss my dog.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Secrets, secrets are SO MUCH FUN!

Since the March on Washington (September 12) ... ie practically the last time I blogged, there has been about 198475298475298745 interesting things have been happening in life. Heres to recording some of them.

For the last two months, our focus has pretty much been on one thing -- the election. There was one tiny little date squeezed in there, but he hasn't called, so I'm going to run with the idea that I've been given the boot. This doesn't bother me. He was cute, yes, and had the body of a guy who rowed crew in college (because, oh wait, HE DID) but seriously, short. And yeah, this is mega vain, but most recently I've learned that I don't really want to compromise on the height front. There really aren't many things I like more than my shoes, most of which just happen to add a considerable height to my frame.

Dear God, please send me a tall future husband. Pretty please. Love, me.
PS-- My life is awesome. Thank you for that. Mad props.

It makes me uncomfortable to be taller than everyone else, but particularly, boys. Anyway moving on, Halloween! Its probably in my top-two holidays, and while I was pretty convinced that the shenanigans would end after college, I'm quite pleased that they haven't. It helps that nearly all of my collegiate influences are out here -- something which I am exceedingly thankful for every time I see them. They're amazing. Together, for Halloween, we were -- hipsters, Harry & Hermione, Uncle Sam & Lady Liberty, Snookie, Rufio (from Hook!), and 80s work-out gurus. There was no trick-or-treating, just a low-key house party with plenty of candy, booze, and laughs.

Two days later, it was game time. Our Washington DC offices served as our foremost headquarters, but we had victory centers scattered all across the US -- Las Vegas, Colorado, West Virginia, Philadelphia, Florida, and South Carolina. Throughout the day, staff and volunteers made thousands of last-minute get-out-the-vote phone-calls and around 5pm the press started to filter in. Then catering arrived. Then booze arrived. Then Mr. & Mrs. Armey arrived. It was a madhouse in the best way possible. Although east-coast polls started to close around 7pm, most of the staff stuck around until well after midnight (when Alaska closed). The last of the press left at 3am...then wrote a rather amazing article about how awesome we are. It was very cool. We got a lot of great press that night, which is always nice, but my favorite aspect of all the stories that came out about us that night was that they really seemed to capture how freaking-awesome our staff really is. This wasn't a sit-around-watch-tv kind of affair, it was a rambunctious, confetti-filled, party that happened to have a focal point. We all work hard, we all play hard, and we all generally like each other. I realize exactly how few other people can say that within their profession. Time Magazine got a pretty good video of the event: http://www.time.com/time/video/player/0,32068,660683925001_2029545,00.html. Note the blue "Chops You Can Believe In" shirts. Haha, yeah, our President has lamb chops -- yeah, we put his face on a shirt. The election was a smashing success, we took back the House and knocked out some key incumbents in the process, but now the work begins.

Part of what we've been planning since September was a post-election retreat that, since its initial planning stages, has been a highly secretive endeavor. Now, event planning has always been one of my very favorite things, so needless to say I was beyond thrilled when our policy analyst tapped me to help organize the retreat.  Our main objective was to bring people together to learn about Austrian economics (free-market), the DC inside-outside game, and other crucial aspects of life on Capitol Hill. The reason for the secrecy? Because all of our invitees were newly-elect members of Congress. I know, I know, that sounds like nothing that needs to be kept under wraps, but we couldn't risk getting scooped or undermined.

Anyway, the retreat took place Thursday-Friday and was nothing short of awesome. Having the opportunity to spend time with newly elect members and get to know them outside of the campaign trail and Capitol was so cool. They're so completely genuine and excited about the opportunities that lay before them. (Please note that I'm refraining from going on political blah blah here and just saying that I'm super pumped.) I'm watching the new 30 Rock as I write this, ironically enough, its a hilarious take on tea-party candidates in Congress.

I got into Baltimore for the retreat on Wednesday, and I gotta say, you know you're dropping a dump-truck full of cash somewhere when you check-in to the hotel and theres a cheese and fruit plate in your hotel room with a signed, personalized, note from the general manager. Woah.

But thats not the most awesome thing that happened this weekend.

Once Thursday morning rolled around, our entire office and most of the newly-elect members were fielding phone calls from the press about what we were doing in Baltimore, who was there, what our agenda was, why we'd kept it secret, etc. By that point, there was no reason for the secrecy anymore, so our communications director decided to handpick his favorite journalists and invite them to a press junket featuring the new members and staff on Friday.

After going through the morning program, I escorted all the new members down to the conference where CNN, FoxNews, Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, and the New York Times were all waiting. They chat, they woo, they do their thing -- and the next thing I know, communications director is standing in front of me being like...uhhh, are you okay with being in the NYT?

-Why?
-Well, you know how you were standing with the guy in the bowtie and Julia (the girl in the patterned wrap dress?
-Yeah...
-Well, the NYT guy leaned over to me and mentioned something about how the three of you look like you just popped out of the Kennedy administration. Then he laughed and said that the young GOP is bringing style back to the party and he wants to publish the photo.

My life is perfect.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Cha-ching-cha-ching-cha-ching.

It is really difficult to describe what I do without sounding like either a stalker or a money-fiend, but I promise you that I am neither. What I enjoy most about my industry is the ability and opportunity to build relationships with people, and over the course of the last month, I have had several really great opportunities to do what I love. Yay.

So having met lots of people in the last few weeks, I wrote several of them letters that not only thanked them for coming but also expressed my joy (that word sounds super cheesy) in getting to finally meet the people behind our organization.

On Thursday, one of these notes netted us $3000.

I made my first money!! Ahhhh!!

So pumped.

Blessed like whoa

It took me about three and a half years of college to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, and even then, it wasn't really a light-bulb-esque epiphany as much as it was a gentle realization that I knew what I wanted and was lucky enough to have an opportunity to pursue it.

Despite this realization, however, I chose to apply for a variety of jobs outside of what I believe (as of today) to be my vocation. Several of these evolved into second and third interviews, and a couple of them were actually quite promising. One of these in particular was a journalism position in Ohio, I mean, yeah, it was Ohio, and I certainly liked journalism, but lets get serious, I'm not particularly passionate about the Midwest or writing for a living.

There were two positions available, and when a friend and I drove down to interview, the President offered her a job on the spot and then later awarded the second position to another friend of mine, an econ major with zero journalism experience.

I was devastated.

But God does everything for a reason.

In July, not only did I hit the jackpot in terms of doing what I love, but I also work in a genuinely amazing office. We're all pretty young. We all love the movement. Work hard, play hard. Rah rah freedom. Moreover, last night, the econ major who had landed the Ohio job with no experience Facebook chatted me to warn me that not only does she hate working there, that my other friend had quit the week before and they were again looking to fill the position.

And then it occurs to me that I'm blessed, like whoa. I love my job. I love what I do. I love who I work with. I love my friends. I love where I live. And lawyer is moving here on October 8.

"I'm Wearing a Red Jacket. I'm black. And I'm Handsome"

Last weekend, my very best friend from college came into town for a couple of days, and to say that we painted the town would be a grand understatement.

KM came in late on Thursday, and I still had to work Friday, so that evening we kicked it at my house. Early Friday, she came to work with me and then spend her day doing a self-guided tour of the capitol, monuments, and museums. (She was especially thrilled to see the Constitution on the anniversary of its signing.) The nice thing about the city is that tons of alumni from our school have made their way here, so there is always someone to catch up with. KM lunched with a guy from college who I knew-of, but had never really met. As far as I knew of him, he was a football meat-head who slept his way through college, a nice guy, but certainly not my type. During the day, I managed to talk one of my co-workers (MD2) into showing us the town and the between the two of us and KM + lunch date, our Friday night foursome was made.

Post-work, KM and I swung into the local World Market (which if you've never been, take my advice and don't go when you're hungry) to pick up libations, chips, and salsa before heading back. One thing I love about us is that we eat. Don't laugh. Everyone reading this has friends that don't--those girls who always order salads and veggies. KM and I are not those people. We polished off a 6-pack and an entire jar of salsa before so much as showering for our PM outing.

Now, before you go any farther, take ten and Google "Esquire I Think You're Fat." This article had half my office buzzing last week. Personally, I think its a nice idea but would make for a pretty cynical world. Honesty is good. Radical honesty is a little much for me. Anyway, as I ran around the office Friday morning, MD2 made KM read the article - a move which later prompted the "radical honesty bar game." The premise? Ask anything and get a completely honest answer. Trust me, you get a few drinks down and everyone is ALL ABOUT radical honesty. It was amazing...and educational, but mostly just awesome. Lets just say we learned a lot.

With one bar down, the three of us moseyed our way to the next where shots and dancing ensued. So. Much. Fun. Then, KM decided she needed Subway. At some point, it was decided that we were all sleeping at MD2's house, and 984092845029485 blocks later, MD2, KM, lunch date and me were all sleeping.

Fast-forward to 6AM Saturday morning. KM's phone rings... its lunch date! Wait. WTF? He's calling? But wait, lunch date is definitely passed out on the couch next to KM.

Hello?
Hi! Who is this?
This is KM, where did you get this phone?
(suddenly, meat-head lunch date realizes that he is, indeed, down a cell phone)

LUNCH DATE LOST HIS PHONE AND NOW A HOBO HAS IT AND IS DEMANDING MONEY TO GET IT BACK!!

Bahahahahahaha! I learn about all of this when I wake up at ten, and so we start calling and calling Homeless to retrieve the phone. Two episodes of Entourage later, we've got no information and growling stomachs so we decide to make our way to brunch.

One hilarious meal later, and long story short, the hobo makes his way to us and returns lunch date's phone for the bargain basement price of $15.

After a night like that, it becomes pretty difficult to out-do yourself, so KM and I spend the rest of her visit enjoying the company and making endless hobo jokes. We wined. We dined. We shopped the mega-amazing-james-perse-sample sale. It was good, and I can't wait to have more visitors...and the adventures that'll surely come with.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Everybody Loves a Good Routine

Generally speaking, the metro is a pretty lovely place. Now, the escalators are always broken and sometimes it smells, but if you can appreciate good people watching...morning rush hour is the place to be. Parking around here is such a nightmare that most people tend to rely upon the trains in one way or another a fact that translates into seeing people from all walks of life on my morning commute. Additionally, I get a newspaper every day! A NEWSPAPER!

Last Thursday morning, I dashed out my door about ten minutes late -- which really isn't a big deal, for the most part, my work doesn't particularity care what time we roll in, so long as we get our responsibilities taken care of -- and after nabbing my paper and rolling my sunglasses up my forehead and into my hair, my morning routine began.

So there I am, standing on the platform, perusing the newspaper and I catch the eye of this boy. Now...I really really really don't want to make this website your one-stop-shop for all the men in my life, because, lets just be honest, there are lots of them, and not in the hanky panky sense, either. Friends. Lots of us are just friends. The others...well...there are those too. Whatever. Bottom line, this is not and will not ever be my man diary. Onward.

He and I lock eyes. Cute. Well-dressed. Back to my newspaper. Then our train arrives, and though I am sure there is some rhyme/reason/mathematical equation for the train crowds in relation to time and day of the week...all that jazz is beyond my level of city expertise, all I know is that on this particular morning, it seems like everyone has decided to ride the metro at 8:30 am.

We pack ourselves in and said boy and I end up side by side. He's got headphones on, Dave Matthews. Good call. So there we stand, and two stops later, the crowd loosens up and I mosey my late and sleepy self to a seat. We lock eyes again. There is an open seat next to me. Like a leading man, he swoops in, and we spend the rest of my ride making mindless small talk.

No names and no numbers exchanged, I spend the rest of my day kicking myself for not just TAKING THE CHANCE! I have business cards, and my name looks damn good on them, why didn't I just give him one?!?!

So this was my Thursday epiphany: I'm a new girl. In a new city. With miles of opportunity around. I've got to be bold. I've got to ditch routines and be late and branch out and meet people and try new things and be young and be alive. Because I'm lucky to be here.

That night, I (of course) relayed the entire story to best friend, who (in her infinite wisdom) tells me that if it is supposed to happen we'll meet again, and damn if I wasn't late on Friday morning.

Halfway through my morning paper, I peek up only to lock eyes with him again. WHAT! Okay, so we've always joked about how my life is a little cinematic sometimes, but really, its now pretty clear that I LIVE IN A MOVIE!

There we are, standing on the train together for the second day, pushed to opposite sides by everyone in between us. Fumbling for a pen, I reach into my purse and whip out one of those shiny new cards and jot down my cell phone number and "What I should have done yesterday." Ugh, terrible handwriting. Reaching back down into my purse, I reach for another card. The final draft. I am shaking. Why am I shaking? Is this what boys feel like when they do this? Wow. Shaking! Poor things. I'll be nicer about that from now on. Focus. Handwriting must be good. Neat. Okay. Its done.

I'm holding this thing in my hot little hands and he steps towards me. Our conversation resumes where we left off yesterday, and as the metro pulls into my station, as calmly as I can, I pass my card along with a wink and a smile.

Its been a week, and I've gotten nothing out of him, but to be honest, I don't really care. It was fun. My little Friday morning adventure, because the idea is bold, people.

We're going for bold.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

You know those days when...

you put together an absolutely killer outfit using only clothes/accessories that you already own and you clomp around town feeling fabulous all day long? Totally had that day yesterday. Knew you'd understand.
-
My week has been bazooka-crazy. Work work work work. But...there are sparkles to tell you about. Stories to come. Xoxo.

(edit: Haha, why did no one tell me about the massive grammatical error I just edited out of here!)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

A Golden Rhinosaurus

I'm mad at myself for not keeping up with this thing like I should.
No excuses. I'll try and do better.

Trying to find a place to live out here was an adventure and a half. Surviving almost solely on four-cheese flavored Cheeze-Its, Circus Animals (frosted animal crackers, which if you have not tried, do so immediately), ham sandwiches and Diet Coke my dad and I made it to St. Louis on day one and into the City on day two.

Home-hunting pretty much went as follows:

Day One -- Found two lovely town houses. One had its own bathroom, three roommates, and a beautiful kitchen. Literally a stone's throw away from the metro. The next had a shared bathroom, two roommates, terrible transportation access and a creek/running trail that ran behind it. The only problems here would be that my commute to work would average forty-five minutes, and I don't do mornings very well.

Day Two -- Oh my gosh. No I do not want to live in the basement of a retired Asian couple with a hotplate in my "kitchen" and the stale smell of geriatrics. Thank you. No.

Day Three -- Toured the token, post-college proverbial frat house. Bottles everywhere. Jersey Shore (no, for real) on the television. Five girls total, plus me. Amazing location. Metro accessible. Mall accessible. Cute house. The very first indication that there might be a problem was the giant Che Guevera poster on the wall. Whatever, I can deal with hipster illusion. One of my key questions in this whole process is, can I visitors? Most of my friends, both collegiate and otherwise, haven't spent much play time in the city, and I need them to come visit. I need my friends around me. Frat house answer? "Oh my God, like YES you can. We had this place packed five deep when all of our friends came for the INAUGURATION..." Oh. Yeah, I can't live here.

Day Four -- We've got two stops scheduled, and the second, although in a pretty prime location would make me the roommate of Ragu and Hamir. Now, I'm pretty open to whatever, but I was not looking forward to that possibility. Fortunately for me, I got to cancel my second appointment, because earlier that morning, I met MM. Shes awesome. A quiet, laid-back, San Diego transplant with good taste in music and furniture whose first roommate (and best friend from college) had signed the lease in May and walked away from it to join the convent by mid June. Yup, convent; she's going to be a nun. MM is fun, low-maintenance, loves vintage stores, and came out here in order to get as far away from home as possible. We're on the same page in a lot of respects...minus the maintenance part. (Oh trust me, I'm well aware that the comb and hairspray that reside permanently in my purse categorize me as anything but.) Our latest same page moment? Simultaneously deciding the the over-sized three dollar wooden rhinoceros sitting on our large bookcase would look better if he was spray-painted metallic gold. Yes, gold.

Like I said, so far--so good.

Monday, August 30, 2010

8/28 - The Restoring Honor Rally

Glenn Beck. Two words that seem to inspire every human emotion possible - love, hate, rage, joy, passion...the list goes on and on.

To be honest, throughout the day on Friday, several co-workers and I predicted that his Restoring Honor rally on Saturday would spark some pretty intense protest. Good ole Rev. Al threatened to crash the party, as did the new Black Panthers and a variety of other activist groups, and my money was on violence.

Now, I love politics and debates and news, but anyone who knows me, is also pretty well aware that despite these things, for the last several years, I've been much more a part of the media than the ra-ra-rally crowd. Beck's Restoring Honor rally on Saturday marked my very first rally experience. (The phrase "go big or go home" comes to mind.) Attendance estimates range anywhere between 100k and 600k, but the bottom line is that there were more people here than anywhere I've ever been in my entire life.

People everywhere.

On Friday, several of our activists left our event explaining that they had to get back to their campsites on the National Mall, many of which their friends had been holding since 10am that morning! Officially, you cannot sleep or camp on the Mall, but you can sit there all night--so they did. Our people are hardcore, and I love them for it! Friday was my first experience meeting several of our activists and VIPs, and not only were they nice, they're all so humble and excited about the political process.

I like the Tea Party movement, and I appreciate that these people are excited about grassroots politics, but having covered the 2008 RNC and some other Michigan events, I must say, my impression of these guys was less than stellar. Too much glitter. Too much red, white, and blue paraphernalia. Where the hell did you buy a golf shirt featuring the Constitution? Too little substance. Too little history. Just lots of people fired up because they hate the administration. GW had stirred up much the same type of resentment on the opposite side of the aisle; what separated the Tea Party from the Bush-haters who emerged in his second term?

The answer? History. Facts. Knowledge. Organization.

Having spent the last two days kickin' it with the Tea Party, I must say, my impression of the movement is vastly different than it was on Thursday. They are not racist. They are not bigots. The listen to talk radio. This isn't about Obama. They brought their kids. They are not looking for a savior or answer. They are just people. Worried people. People concerned for our country. Concerned because they have the depth and knowledge to appreciate what we've got here. I think what worries the Tea Party the most is what we might lose.

Young. Old. Black. White. Whatever. Everyone I spoke to on Friday and Saturday was just happy to be there. People with cameras are scary, but without so much as an introduction, folks were eager to chat and nearly always interested in learning more about what brought the four of us to Saturday's rally.

We didn't have interviews, we had conversations.

The tiny journalist that still lives inside me was shaking in her boots. This is not how this works.

And I think that's why the mainstream media sucks at covering the Tea Party.
Because they quite literally don't know what to do with these people.
They're too nice. Too chatty. Too homegrown.
And that's not how this works.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Kill all the Lawyers, Except This One

Having jetted away to college, I learned early that there are two types of long-distance friendships: those that buckle and fracture under the strain of time and the ones where the conversation always seems to pick up just where you left off.

I spent Saturday evening enjoying LK's homemade raspberry lemonade and the company of several other college friends. I haven't seen any of them since a wedding last year, but they're still like family. Our partying habits have evolved, however. Haha, I love seeing the crowd that (quite literally) taught me how to do a keg-stand, roasting marshmallows on a Saturday night. It was adorable.

Sunday, my roommate and I reunited with CK and MH to visit the DC Aquarium, and $9 later I learned that fish still swim. Post fishys, we roamed the national portrait gallery and ventured up the red line to the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception at Catholic University. There really isn't an adequate way to describe the beauty and serenity of Shrine; its simply breath-taking, and Catholic or not, its impossible not to appreciate.

So, lawyers in this town aren't really lawyers; they're lobbyists, and lobbyists are "bad." They're the guys in the perfectly tailored suits with cars and drivers, pimping the joys of tobacco and alcohol products on the steps of Capitol Hill every morning. Guns. Healthcare. Cigarettes. Booze. Pills. Food. Special Interests are all controlled by lobbying. Generically speaking, these guys are douchebags. Stay. Away. (Or, if you feel like playing around, get your gifts and then get out.) No marriage. No commitment. Just fun. But, I digress. Lawyers, as a rule are not good news, unless...you meet them by chance during happy hour with a bunch of co-workers and it turns out that they interned with the firm you worked for and now they're in town interviewing for several different positions with family organizations, as a child-advocacy lawyer. In this case, they're adorable. Correction...he's adorable. Because there's probably only one.

Things you need to know? Texas. Hot. Like two inches too short. Probably moving here next month. Great taste in music. Super sweet. Bad a text-chatting. Loves Jesus. Got my number. And held the door.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

"Both. That's why I invented the bifocal..."

Arriving on King Street, I cabbed it down to a fabulous Irish pub on the water. Take note, cabbies are absolute babies about taking credit cards around here and it is massively annoying, but on my way to the bar, whiny-cabbie explained why.

According to him, the cab companies take their sweet time processing credit card charges. You may pop from Reagan into the City on Monday, but they won't run the card until Friday. This is problematic for two reasons. One: your driver doesn't get his share for days, sometimes weeks, after you charge a fare. Secondly, companies take care to make sure that they make as much money as possible and in doing so, have no shame in removing a credit card processing fee from the tip! Lesson learned? If you must charge a fare, at least tip your driver in cash. Crabby cabbie no more.

So, Irish Pub #1 was awesome. Cute and crowded. And the boys? They had a cold Cape Cod waiting for me. They'd been there for an hour by the time I rolled in so after a few drinks we moved on to Irish Pub #2.

This place is decked out with photos of the owner with everyone from Pope John Paul II to Ronald Reagan and despite the crappy music was awesome. Oh, and the bartender was hot. Like, really hot. The old guy crooning inside ruined the vibe so we take the party to the patio.

It's notable that these are my frat boys and while I am very much the girl who couldn't care less about vulgarity, I really don't want to deal with a fight...so when MH nudges CK, saying, "Hey, figure out who that guy is dressed up as," my mind snaps to attention. Turning to my left I spy nothing less than a post-middle age man in full colonial dress. Hat. Buckle shoes. Pipe. Kickers. Socks. A ruffled shirt he could have quite possible stolen from my closet. All of it.

"Play nice," I plead.

Ignore. "Excuse me, sir? Who are you supposed to be?"

"Well young man, I am James Madison."

...Excuse me? WHAT? Sweet Jesus. I know exactly where this is going.

"So, umm, Mr. Madison, as a Federalist, what is your opinion of modern political theory?"

Here we go.

"Well..."

About thirty minutes in to this little convo, we told Madison to pull up a chair, at which point, our dear Founding Father decided to comment on how "distracting" my legs were. Cue my getting another round...

I return to a point/counter-point on Colonial political platforms. For the visual learners in today's crowd, here's a 30-second preview of my night:

Two hours, three drinks, and one bartender's phone number later we said our goodbyes to Madison and I headed back towards the metro. Truth be told, it was the PERFECT inaugural Friday evening. Welcome to the city. More to come. Xoxo!

Monday, August 23, 2010

From Mountains to Metro, pt. II

Emotional breakdowns at work, bad. Emotional breakdowns on your second day, worse.

Thankfully, my new BFF Genesis (yup, real name; a total sister rockin' it at the Penn quarter Kinkos) saved my ass by not only being helpful, but overwhelmingly kind and sweet.

Lets begin at square one. On Friday, two friends of mine from college (one visiting, the other headed back to school in a few days) invited me on the town to join them for dinner and drinks that night. I let them know that I'd meet them in Old Town when I was done and went on my way. That afternoon, my team and I were charged with building a large-scale mailing to be produced in-house and mailed that afternoon. Now, normally, this is not a big deal: compile the materials, wave a magic wand across Microsoft Word, print the package and letters, slap on some labels/postage and you're done, but no. By the time we got everything proofed and ready to print, our color copier decided that it didn't particularly feel like coming to work that day. Cool. Total hurdle, but not insurmountable.

So, I roll into the copy-shop at 4:30 knowing full well that the odds of my making dinner are shot but I'm still game for drinks. Tell the boys I'd be there at 7:30 and start making 1000+ back-to-back color copies of materials plus another 1000+ 4-page one-sided letter. All in all, a lot of effing copies. About $2300 worth, to be exact.

TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS IN COPIES ON MY SECOND DAY OF WORK! Now, for whaterver reason, this ignited panic. Its my second day, and I've just racked up thousands of dollars in copying charges. So, I got to get a receipt from the desk and their reader doesn't register any charges on the credit card. Seriously? Okay, so I made this many copies blah blah blah, sign the thing, chat it up with my new friend about where to go in the city, etc.

Now, at this point I'm pretty convinced, for whatever reason, they they're going to fire me over this whole thing, a feeling undoubtedly fueled by copious amounts of caffeine and no food. Swinging into Starbucks, a berry coffee cake saves my sanity, and tucking what feels like seven reams of paper into my purse, I stroll back to the office.

Just as the clock strikes 10:45 it is finally time to meet the boys at the bar...which is where the real fun begins.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

From Mountains to Metro

Gazing out my window at 6am on my very first day of work, all I can see are clouds. CLOUDS EVERYWHERE! And here in my beautiful new home: clouds mean rain, rain means humidity, and humidity means that on my first day my hair will be an absolute wreck!

Even with the 3.5 hours from my-anxiety ridden-awakening-time until my delayed-first-day-start-time, there would be no way in hell that I was going to pull off a suitable hairdo.

This is quite obviously unacceptable.

Whatever. Two hours later I awoke again to put my act together for real, and rolled out the front door of my apartment building to a resounding POOF!

Me: What the eff?
God: Oh, no worries, thats just you hair exploding into a giant blonde afro frizz ball!

Mentally mixing hard lemonade out of my newly acquired lemons, I walk to the metro and stroll into work right one time. Nine million signatures later, I was done with HRs paperwork mountain, and then the real work started.

Some jobs spend hours and hours on training and shadowing, which, lets get serious (unless you're a nurse or learning a foreign language) is pretty much just a waste of everyone's time. No no, not here. Metaphorically, they attached me to a crane and dropped me into the ocean. Before the end of my first day, I had a stack of tasks for Friday and a desk all my own! I share my space with one of our marketing guys, Shatner. No, not his real name, just his nickname, but hes a dead ringer for William and that makes it funny. He's hilarious, and even better, we have the same sense of humor. We're both pretty new, so its a good time.

Day one? Awesome. Day two? Almost had a nervous breakdown at Kinkos.

What's in a name?

On the off chance that someone who doesn't know me comes across this thing -- there are pretty much only two things you need to know:

1. I have a shotgun in my closet
2. It sits next to my stilettos.

Now, on to more interesting things...